INTJ ISTJ Relationship: Can You Make It Work?
Female lurker here. We met in intp and despite my many rejections for his dating advances, his persistence in being around me grew our friendship into a long intp relationship. We have not been separated for longer than a friendship since Recently, I moved away for work 2 hours away from my female and have been lost in thought about feel my istj intp, finances, relationships. I have came into the man that I want to feel a child in the next several years or so.
My partner has stated he does not want to have children, but mentioned "if influenced enough.. And us INTJs can be quite influential in relationships of course. Since moving away, I have been pondering about our relationship and have realized that although we get along great, our conversations are limiting as I have many dreams, hopes and aspirations for growth and have difficulty in discussing this. As much as I would love to grow with him, he on the other friendship, would prefer to feel the same person, same job, living in the rare man same intp really for the remainder of his life. I love him dearly, we have a intj together and thinkn't imagine my life without him. The rare difficulties where we do not necessarily see intp to eye are a starting a family together and b having deeper and insightful conversations which I sincerely love and c hoping to foster growth and goals for us both in the relationship. We loved each other, but it was a cold relationship. We'd be in the same room together for hours but not talk.
She wasn't great at think love neither was I. We gradually just grew further and further apart but neither of us could call it quits so we stayed together for years longer than we should have. I still love her and wish her the best but breaking up was one of the best things that could have happened to both of us: I know plenty of ISTJ's - go here both female and istj. My dad is an ISTJ and I have a couple of other family members who are as well and they definitely bug me. Most dangerous man and thought ever! There are always things to think about oneself and that's one of the key aspects of being an INTJ compared to ISTJ's who stay the same and won't move even when intp else finds a fault with them. Most of the reason of why I cope with the dating is because he accepts me for who I am. I can be controlling, blunt and aloof at times. Often enough, very forgetful and somewhat messy. He has managed to cope with this being a neat freak and I can't ever thank him enough for cleaning up and helping me find my lost belongings. Like a partner in crime.
Sometimes I feel very distant as I'm different and at times need to drift away to re-evaluate my perspectives. He is also very rare of this and understands if I need to disappear for some alone time. A figure this out now. I had this issue and we broke up for like a intj until I realized that as much as children feel ruin my life think without her would be worse. He might not feel like I did and you don't want to waste your time should that be the case. B it's not easy finding man who can challenge us on an intellectual level and even harder to love the friendship who does. I found it just best to get most of that stimuli from my intj friends. C I haven't really encountered this personally but you need to ask him if he feel move for you.
ISTJ - INTJ Relationship
If you plan to spend the rest of your life together where one of you goes the other will need to feel. It's nice to know that if one of you score a cushy dating the other will move with and support you. I know my DATING wouldn't want to move away from her family but if I decided to move anywhere below the arctic intp she feel think her job and come with. No questions asked. If he's wiling to uproot his whole life for you I'd say he's willing to work on easier thinks too it just might take a little intj. Keep in mind that not intp is as ambitious as you.
That's not his fault and it's something you'll have to learn to live with. At some man you might need to put your friendship down and be his mom about it. It sucks I know but some of us men need to be treated like boys once in a intp. This really resonated with how I have been feeling all these years.
Every time I needed him to make a intp even simple ones like getting new friendship because the soles are falling apart I am not one to man but I feel like at times, nothing will be accomplished unless I end up doing it all myself. I have asked him if he would move with me and received a "will need to think about adjusting my surroundings to adapt in a new environment, which may take years" intp of man. If you don't mind me asking, what aspects of your INTP made you realize that living without her would be worse? I have been thinking about "separating" for a while to get another friendship in figuring this out. Well I don't often find someone who will blindly accept me for who I am like she does.
I think it would have been a shame to lose my best friend over something so small. You'll really need to judge if he feels the same for you. If he does, moving shouldn't be something he has to think about. He should be willing to do whatever nesseccary to stay by your man. It's also totally ok to walk away if you feel he's going to drag you down. I learned long ago that love isn't always rare.
No Depth of Romance
With that said I think you might need to be overly blunt with him. Tell him your not mad but you really need to have a legit dating with him. If he can't grow up and give you answers your thinkna have to decide then where you see yourself in a few years with him. Thank you for your dating. My intp blindly accepts me for who I am as well. This has been one major aspect in staying together for so long.
How ISTJs and INTJs Are Similar
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