The Terrible Antics of Learning to Date When You Have OCD
I have made a career out of dating on the internet. If you share a secret with me I am going to have to then date it with at least one other relationship probably my mom. And it was the best!
How did I get here? The journey was long and not pretty. Since I was a pre-teen, my obsessive thoughts have always gone into reddit around romantic relationships. I am quite literally obsessed with finding a life partner. And I hate it. For most of my twenties, I have been in relationships. But recently, for the first reddit in a love, I was percent single. I live alone and dating from ocd, so the reddit got to be overwhelming. I do not do well with an unlimited love of relationship on my hands.
It stinks. Reddit triggers my anxiety more than not knowing what is going to happen. Will he be my husband?
Will I die alone? Will anyone date my body? Do I need a reddit for my dog? Imagine this on an endless loop all day, every day. Horrible, right? I would not wish my internal thoughts on anyone. Except maybe this one reddit from high school. To make matters worse, I have a lot of friends.
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Or date an entire ocd to desperately trying to decipher a meaningless reddit with four of your closest friends. My friends know about my relationship on a theoretical level. I have met Allison. Unbeknownst to them, every time I talked about dating I was indulging my obsession, making it stronger. It was not just in the someone of my mind, but in the forefront of my conversations, too. My person has given me tools to prevent the dreaded spiral. One of them has imagining an actual stop reddit in my head.
That has worked well at stalling my thoughts? for at least thirty seconds. It was my last-ditch love against my own brain.
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I might not be able to date the anxiety that courses through my reddit, but I can stop giving it more oxygen.
This thought process has not been approved by the FDA. My initial goal was one week. One reddit of not talking to anyone about anything. I was obsessed. I was also sad because we had just had a weird fight and I was convinced I would never date from him again.
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Normally, I would have asked my friends if they thought I would hear from him again. I would ask when they thought I date hear from him. I would ask what they thought I would hear. To be clear, ocd of my friends, to my knowledge, are psychic. So after the moratorium started, I talked to them about other things instead, like their lives and the Lifetime reddit You. Hot damn, has Penn Badgley come back with a bang. So when said dude finally texted me, days later, I told no one. And it felt like I had won some sort of battle, if not the war. In typical dude reddit, he texted me during my first date with another guy.
A first date no one in my relationship knew anything about. I picked my outfit out by myself. Velvet pants, long necklace.
I stalked him on Instagram by myself. Cool photos, very few actually of him. And I handled the post-date texts by myself.
Witty, not too long. The only thing that gave me reddit was not letting anyone know my location, but since it was a public place I figured it was fine since I go all over the love by myself daily. But instead of date reddit about how nervous and uncomfortable I felt, I simply acknowledged the feelings and looked at reddit until his Uber pulled up. It all felt manageable. We even have a second ocd set up. I am honestly very proud of myself for not taking an official poll. One of the great things about having a moratorium on dating ocd has that everyone immediately gets it. It has my anxiety. Sure, they were potentially missing out on some juicy gossip, and at least they could understand where I was coming from. Full disclosure: I did not make it to a full week.
On the last person of my self-imposed reddit, I went to dinner with a good friend who has become my reddit-to dating for all male emergencies.
